divergent paths and harbored guilt

we are capable of inflicting the worst possible pains on those we hold most dear. time, patience, distance, space, wants, needs, plans, dreams, desires, self-consciousness, self-confidence. these things tried and true and tired and rude and rhythmic. we dance around our alter-egos, pretending we care more about this than that or me or you or them. we lead each other on in order to test our limits, see what we can get away with. the health of our partner is not always in the forefront of our minds but we still and always care like a river flows. anger and madness are our sometimes bedfellows and occasionally we make pacts with peace or slumber. overall our shock at the flying hours only leaves us room to shrink back into ourselves, our shells, our foxholes.