"Assertion: Modern culture is in the midst of a hidden epidemic of fathers leaving their families - usually around the time when the first child is born. Men leave their families in a multitude of ways. Even if they remain in the home, many fathers are often emotionally absent - through depression, workaholism, violence/aggression, physical or emotional abuse, or a retreat into addiction to substances, media, consumer goods, sports, food or sex.
Most men in the "developed" nations today never bonded (or very poorly bonded) with their mothers. Most people don't even notice how disconnected modern people are from each other, compared to cultures where the bond is still intact.
Yes, we talk of alienation and notice how much people in Mediterranean cultures touch each other, but we make no connection between these phenomena and how our bonds among people, with nature, and with the divine have been torn asunder. I propose that this unnoticed, silent epidemic of disconnection/alienation is the source of most societal ills. Fathers leaving their children and their families is only the tip of an iceberg."
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1 comment:
I just want to point out one thing... I was born in a hospital, but in general received all of the love and natural goodness of attentive, excited organic parents. I was breast-fed, spent lots of time with my mother in the first year, the whole gamut. But look, I still get depressed and life is not perfect. Detachment and depression are not limited to men, and are not solved by having grown up with a mother and father who were loving and there. These things help to rear a wholesome human, but I don't think we ever end up entirely adjusted. The world is just too fucked up. Causes are not limited to human society; the simple fact remains that people die and it is sad, no matter how unindustrialized your culture is. And let me tell you, wholesome organic people are still suceptible to addiction. They still leave each other. They still expect more from each other than they can sometimes get. We can't just expect to feel at peace and happy about everything - we need emotional tension in our lives in order to keep us moving, and to keep us growing. Some of our feelings are not joyful, and everybody fucking well better get used to it and just deal.
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