Saturday, July 22, 2006

kick ball, beer, and books

i must be the world's best walking anachronism. always in the right place at the wrong time or the wrong place at the right time. my heart walks circles around my head, each trying to convince me the other is the crazy crazy. fucking lakefair in downtown Olympia and I'm working at the bookstore dreaming of the beach and how much I hate the people who flock to the downtown for this stupid carnival. They don't even read their cereal boxes much less Bakunin or Baudelaire. So what good are they to me?

I'm feeling a little feisty and cynical today, nice mix what with the heat and swelter. today i put up a sign on the front counter that read: "For service please step outside with the books you would like to purchase and gesticulate wildly at the strange bearded man sitting in the window of the bar across the street wearing a black shirt and rainbow parachute pants. We will be with you shortly." Then I went across the street, sat down and had a couple beers. The sign worked! Twice! People waved at the wrong bar, I put my beer down, trotted across the street and sold them their books. There's been talk of having a bell installed next to the table by the window at the bar connected to a rope across the street at our bookstore's counter. It's too damn hot to work today and we're all worked up over our little downtown being invaded by barbarians so we play kickball across 4th avenue and keep the bastards on their toes. Ahhh, the life of a pirate.

What tales the heart can spin the head and what a fool the head is for ever listening. Dreams of her run through my head. I juxtapose each past lover against all the others, holding them all up together to see what shape their combination might contain, as if by mere close scrutiny alone I can decipher the secrets of my own shallow hallowed heart. As if by reading my own story I will see where I am going... but I don't want to be that predictable. The best books, like the best lovers always keep you guessing. At least when your heart is wild and seeks wildness to sustain itself. Opposites attract, compliment, convince, deceive, critique and walk together paw in paw through a landscape foreign to them both, inventing islands.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

oh man do i miss hanging out with you! i too spent my weekend overwhelmed by the heat and the carnage of lakefair. the lover both you and i are pining for is living in that back room of last word books. i'm thinking a threesome of ink, paper, and mismatched type while you and i actively watch....